Moments like this make Jason entirely aware of how very vulnerable he is beneath the armor he bears as St. Cecilia's resident 'Golden Boy.' Really, he is made of nothing more than ribbons and loaded words and the sort of feelings that nearly cripple his heart. All it takes is for one thread to fall out of place, and he'll come undone. He wonders often how much longer he can go on like this; then he buries thinking those thoughts at all, the way he tries to bury the truth of who he is every day.
While on the phone with his father, Jason clings to the tendrils of Peter's voice that filter through the crack of the door between them. He clutches at the lightness and obvious affection he harbors for his mother, claiming them like strips of bandages to help cover his own gaping wounds. They make up for their minuscule size with the weight of their love, and ultimately, they are what keep Jason from breaking down completely in the middle of the office.
He thanks God when he hears Peter put the phone down nearly seconds after his father hangs up on him. He has to pause to take in several, shuddering breaths as he tries to focus on the hand on his shoulder and the voice from next to him. His heart misses a beat at all the love Peter bestows upon him with that gentle gaze and that sweet voice. Jason wants nothing more than to melt into him, so he readily agrees to head back to their dorm, where he already plans on pushing their mattresses together, curfew check be damned. He won't sleep tonight if he can't spend the night in his boyfriend's arms.
"Okay," Jason nods, without hiccuping, even. He glances up at Peter before quickly glancing around to find that, for the moment, they're alone, with Sister Rachel buried in paperwork. He reaches out and squeezes Peter's hand, clinging as though it were a life boat.
"Yeah, I...I just want to get back," he nods, standing up and following Peter, craving the inevitable closeness awaiting them once they return to their room.
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While on the phone with his father, Jason clings to the tendrils of Peter's voice that filter through the crack of the door between them. He clutches at the lightness and obvious affection he harbors for his mother, claiming them like strips of bandages to help cover his own gaping wounds. They make up for their minuscule size with the weight of their love, and ultimately, they are what keep Jason from breaking down completely in the middle of the office.
He thanks God when he hears Peter put the phone down nearly seconds after his father hangs up on him. He has to pause to take in several, shuddering breaths as he tries to focus on the hand on his shoulder and the voice from next to him. His heart misses a beat at all the love Peter bestows upon him with that gentle gaze and that sweet voice. Jason wants nothing more than to melt into him, so he readily agrees to head back to their dorm, where he already plans on pushing their mattresses together, curfew check be damned. He won't sleep tonight if he can't spend the night in his boyfriend's arms.
"Okay," Jason nods, without hiccuping, even. He glances up at Peter before quickly glancing around to find that, for the moment, they're alone, with Sister Rachel buried in paperwork. He reaches out and squeezes Peter's hand, clinging as though it were a life boat.
"Yeah, I...I just want to get back," he nods, standing up and following Peter, craving the inevitable closeness awaiting them once they return to their room.