I've never been so scared.

Jason falls into a sort of routine, now that the shock of finding himself in Darrow has settled, a bit. He wakes up, eats breakfast, gets dressed, and heads out of his apartment. He tries to avoid being inside his apartment as much as he can. And not just because he is somewhat avoiding Peter, either. He feels trapped inside that building; caught between the ended life he left behind and the life he previously established here in Darrow, apparently.

So he goes out. He goes for his morning run, thrilling in the way each breath aches inside his chest and each dreaded thought falls apart to the beat of his music. He always lingers at the beach, drawing a strange comfort from how humble the waves crashing against the shore make him feel.

He stops for a coffee; he lets himself unwind from his exertion. He lets himself have a ridiculous, cream-filled pastry as a snack and reads whatever newspaper or book he’s brought with him. He doesn’t have a particular café that appeals to him; he likes the variety of stopping at a different place every time.

He wanders, mostly, after that. Sometimes, he shops. In his first days in Darrow, Jason immediately set out to finding new clothes; his funereal suit he keeps buried in the back of his closet, stuffed away like some old ragdoll. He shops for groceries once or twice a week, usually just little trips to catch up on what he needs. Sometimes, if he feels indulgent, he shops for a book or two. Last week, he bought himself a volume of Keats.

Today, however, Jason heads back to his apartment after his stop at a café. He changes into the nicest clothes he currently has on hand, a pair of dress pants and a simple dress shirt, complete with functional tie, which he can just barely tie. He steps into his oxfords and grabs the resume he hurriedly typed up the previous night. He leaves the apartment for the second time that day.

He goes for three interviews, nearly in a row. One is for an unpaid internship, which, while it would look appealing on his resume, won’t do Jason much good in the way of extra cash. The next two are for actual jobs. However, at the very beginning of both interviews, Jason realizes that he lacks the experience for both jobs. Discouraged though he is afterwards, Jason still goes out of his way to stop and apply at three more places before the afternoon is out.

Jason sighs as he makes his way into his apartment, falling back against the door as it swings shut. He brings his hands up to rub his head, feeling defeated. He can’t give up, he reminds himself internally. He has to be strong for Peter. He also finds that, although he doesn’t know Magnus, he doesn’t want to let him down, either.

Letting out a sigh, Jason makes himself a cheap, microwave supper and grabs an even cheaper beer from the fridge, settling down in front of the television in the living room. Tomorrow is another day, he supposes.

Before he begins to eat, however, Jason pulls out his cellphone. He types out a message, a simple inquiry, really, before shooting it off to Peter. He tries to text him at least once a day, even if they don’t see each other. He wants him to know he’s here, even if it’s hard on both of them right now. A gesture of support, really.

That done, Jason takes a swig of beer and digs into his overly greasy food. Another day down.